A lonely Monster

Monster: Can you understand what I said?

People: Waaaaaa.........Ohhhhhh........Go away.

Monster: Please I'm not going to hurt you.

People: Waaaaaa........No...no....no....Please don't kill me.

Monster: I want to be your friend.

People: Noooo......I'm not tasty at all......Please let me go.

Monster: Can you come with me to home, I can make you some tea and food, we can be a really good friend.

People: Let me go. No No No......Don't touch me. Stop.....Help.....Help

Monster: I can take you home.

People: hoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo...........

Monster: Hey, Hey my friend? Wake up my friend! Hey Hey......................Why people always left without me?

END

A Drunky Monster

Monster: I want to kiss you.

Monster and A: mmmmmm........mmmmmm...m.m.m..m.m..m.m.m.

Monster: I want to kiss you as well.

Monster and B: mmmmmmm.......mmmmm.mmm....armmmar.....ar.....

Monster: Can I kiss you?

C: FUCK OFF

END

Monster without a PENIS.

Monster: Give me your Penis.

Man: No.......No........I can't give it to you.

Monster: I want it now. Other wise I will kill you.

Man: I will lost my profession and my 'Fluffer' will lost his job.

Monster: That's why I want it. Give it to me.

Man: I don't want to change my career, I don't know what to do next, I need my penis.

Monster: Do you want to die?

Man: I rather die. Please let me die with my profession.

END

Monster which is native English speaker.

Monster: Heeellllllloooooooooo.

Mike: Oh, hi whassup man.

Monster: Where are you from?

Mike: I'm from Hong Kong.

Monster: Oh, yeah I went there.

Mike: Do you like it?

Monster: It was great. I love it so much. People are YUMMY.

END

Monster with a dairy cow skin

Farmer: 1,2,3 Hey you have a lot of milk today.

Monster: Ready? May be to day is not a good day.

Farmer: Oh, you are right. My wife just die.

Monster: I don't want to say sorry.

Farmer: Not only this. Two of my sister die as well.

Monster: It is because you are so Lucky.

Farmer: Also, my father and my mother die as well.

Monster: I feel proud of you, my friend.

Farmer: I'm working hard to get more and more milk from you.

Monster: You are very welcome. Take as much as you want. I hope you can be a super lucky man in this world.

Farmer: Yes, I think my son will die tomorrow.

Monster: Great, serve my milk with a cute bottle. He will be happy to down it.

Farmer: I hope all my family can drink the milk.

END

A hairy Monster

Monster: I need a hair cut.

Hair Stylist: I'm not going to design a hair style for you.

Monster: No, here is my penis. I will pay for you.

Hair Stylist: Wa....I don't need that much. Ok I cut the hair for you but I just want your underwear.

Monster: Ok. Do it then.

Hair Stylist: Mmmm.....I'm gonna to cut this bit. Here is too heavy. I will cut this as well..........Yadda Yadda Yadda

SIX HOURS LATER.

Hair Stylist: Now, you look fantastically scary.

END

Monster with a big eye.

Kid: Hello! Hello! Can you see me?

Monster: Yes, of course, I've an Eye.

Kid: I'm Mike from Hong Kong. Nice to meet you. Can we shake Hand.

Monster: Oh, I'm The EYE, Nice to meet you. Let's shake hand.

Kid & Monster: oh ......oh......eee.....a.......

Monster: Sorry about the misjudge.

End

Monster with a PENIS

Monster: You are so beautiful.

She: Would you please fuck me? I would like to taste your penis.

Monster: Yeah baby, come here.

She: You are so HOT. That's what I want.

Monster: Let me put my finger into your pussy.

She: Mmmmmmm........

Monster: Woo....Excuse me! What is that? Are you gay?

She: Is that what you want?

End